The Inner Critic and How to Silence it

My fiancé, a massage therapist, came home from the chiropractic clinic where he has his massage practice a few weeks ago, and told me they needed a chiropractic assistant to fill in for the main assistant – who for all intents and purposes runs the office – on Thursdays. He wondered if I might be interested in speaking with “Doc,” as we affectionately refer to the chiropractor and clinic founder, about the position.

I thought, “One day a week. Consistent extra income. Why not?”  So, I contacted Doc and made an appointment for an interview. I then went in for a half day “trial run,” and she offered me the job that same evening. I accepted because it felt like a good match, and was only one day a week, without putting a whole lot of thought into it.

I knew it was a thriving clinic, that what some people call “multi-tasking” (which is really rapid serial-tasking), and going through a weekend-long training, passing a test, and becoming a Certified Chiropractic Assistant was required. I spent 13 and a half years of my life as a workers’ compensation claims examiner, often as a Senior Adjuster handling complex and traumatic injury and stress claims, sometimes with challenging employer accounts, so I wasn’t too concerned about the challenges of working in a chiropractic clinic.

However, I didn’t take into consideration: 1) the steep learning curve associated with working only one day a week, which is like starting your first day all over again every Thursday for several weeks, and 2) the difference between working for one insurance company with one computer system and a specific claims handling process versus needing to verify insurance on patients with different insurance companies with different computer systems and multiple claims handling processes.

One Thursday evening around 6:00, clinic closing time, I was so frustrated I was ready to either pull all my hair out (and I’m quite fond of my hair) or quit on the spot.

Fortunately, instead of either of those options, I found the courage to voice my frustration to Doc, and later to the main assistant.

Guess what I discovered?

Neither of them expected me to just know how to do all this stuff right then and there, being so new, working only one day a week, with limited training time.

It was my inner critic, the judge, that sure as hell expected me to be a master right now, that thought I didn’t have a right to be new, and learning, discovering the process as I went along.

As my partner said, when I vented to him, “All you can do is give it 100%, do the best you can do, and leave the rest up to God.”

I now say to the inner critic, “Thank you for your opinion. I’m going to keep learning and discovering; you can be quiet now.” And I begin to feel empowered, as I gain competence.

Where in your life can you give it your best, leave the rest up to your higher power, however you define it, so the inner critic will be silenced? Let us know on the blog!

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Authentically Yours, Laura